On An AIDS-Free Generation in Africa

Two years ago, the Joint United Nations Programme on HIV/AIDS (UNAIDS) declared that “Getting to Zero.” would be the theme of World AIDS Day until 2015. 

Their decision reflected the simple fact that we are closer than we ever have been to achieving an AIDS-free generation. But even as we near what many consider to be the end of the global HIV/AIDS epidemic, it is important we not lose sight of the people and places that have been hit particularly hard by the disease.

The silence around HIV/AIDS and its impact on the LGBT community in Africa must be broken. While there have been verbal and sometimes policy-level commitment by African governments regarding equal access to HIV treatment, care and prevention,  LGBT Africans are left out of the picture more often than not. Unfortunately, the mere mention of LGBT persons in Africa are often dismissed by religious clergy, politicians and cultural leaders.  They falsely accuse human rights activists and public health practitioners as “being influenced by the West” and/or paid HIV peddlers and moral decadents.”

It is this type of cultural, religious and political resistance that has long driven the high prevalence of HIV/AIDS in Africa. Their unwillingness to accept sexual and gender minority persons in Africa has generated profound stigma and societal hostility, thus making this LGBT persons extremely difficult to reach.

We can no longer sit by and watch the number of HIV infections rise among lesbian and bisexual women in Africa. –A recent study entitled Forced Sexual Experiences as Risk Factor for Self-Reported HIV Infection among Southern African Lesbian and Bisexual Women found out that 10% of women who have sex with women in four southern African countries are HIV-positive. The study suggests that the main source of infection among lesbians is likely ‘corrective or curative’ rape. The trauma these woman face once they have been attacked is often compounded when they seek help from police or health care workers, which keeps them from getting tested or treated for HIV.

As religious and cultural fundamentalists continue defending what they term “moral values”, they seem far removed from the lived realities of the very people for whom they claim to speak. Like a baobab tree whose large base is the cornerstone of a society, the few self-proclaimed and often privileged “watchdogs” fail to see, or choose to ignore, how the base of the tree has lost some of its foundation.

Thankfully, there are reasons to be optimistic. The 17th International Conference on AIDS and STIs in Africa (ICASA) conference will take place in South Africa December 7th through the 11th. The conference will bring together approximately 10,000 participants, including leading scientists, policy makers, activists, persons living positively with HIV and government leaders.

LGBT persons from across the African continent constitute a significant percentage of the conference which is held every two years.  While we should be on the lookout for promises to curb HIV/AIDS by those African governments in attendance, it is still painfully ironic that of the 77countries that still have punitive laws against same-sex conduct, 37 of them are African states. These punitive laws do nothing but validate the stigmatization of persons affected and infected with HIV.

On this 26^th anniversary of World AIDS Day, it is important for us to remember we all share a common humanity. If we are not careful, the indifference and inaction of those who should, and can act, will overshadow any progress we might hope to make.

On this 26^th anniversary of World AIDS Day, it is important for us to change the narrative concerning HIV/AIDS in Africa. I am proud to be one of the many African voices calling for justice when and where it matters most for the African people.

www.hrc.org/resources/entry/hrc-issue-brief-hiv-aids-and-the-lgbt-community 

Careers in Africa – Attitude 101

A good friend of mine who is interning at HRC asked me if I could join her class at the University of ‘Career Night’ and speak in a panel on careers in Africa. On further consultation, the unit lecturer told  me that she wanted the students to hear from me, very candidly about how Africans view them and how to work together in "partnership" rather than using past "colonial" approaches which essentially emphasized what the American had to bring and/or "give" to Africans.

Part of this candid discussion was to help the students develop "appropriate attitudes” when foreigners come to work in Africa especially on development and conflict issues.  

For a clearer understanding of what the class thought of Africa, I asked them for random thoughts on their views of Africa and what perceptions they had of Africans. I got beautiful, land of opportunity, beautiful people and of course, that Africa is a continent, not a country. Good start it was.

And so my rant began.

Oftentimes, there is a very reductive narrative about Africa, a very reducible portrayal of African people, and when Westerners are talking about Africa, it’s even more heightened by the already terrible victimization of the continent. I appreciated that the class was covering topics on African leaders and conflict.

My challenge though was that it is an open secret that though there is crippling corruption perpetuated by people in power in Africa; most of their pockets are lined by westerners and western syndicates which benefit from ongoing conflicts to rip off resources such as oil and minerals. They ensure that armed militia had weapons, and that their corrupt African allies have offshore bank accounts, massive mansions in their counties and some, guaranteed placement to high end schools and universities for their kin.

It is no secret either that the Aid culture has left African countries more debt ridden, more inflation prone, more vulnerable to impulses of the currency markets, and has made the poor poorer, and the growth slower. In my opinion, Aid is an unmitigated political and economic power play, primarily because it is not sustainable. This is not to say that aid is entirely bad for Africa, but because of the simple fact that Africa is a rich continent, with vast resources, only that Africans have absolutely no control over these resources.

Calls for more aid to Africa are growing louder, from the international community. This kind of aid has provided band-aid solutions to alleviate immediate suffering, but by its very nature cannot be the platform for long-term sustainable growth.

ATTITUDE:

I am always appalled when foreigners come back from their volunteer work or short term placement in some African countries and when they come back; they give talks of how their experience was, and how, as an outcome of work there, they saved entire villages.

I am reminded of an interventions where families in rural African states have mosquito nets donated to them. After a couple of nights, the women take the mosquito nets and use them in the gardens, to shield their crops from preying birds and rodents. While the foreigners pull out their hair about this inconceivable action, they fail to realize that they completely missed the priority for such a family. Fending for children and ensuring they have enough to eat supersedes the need to protect them from mosquitoes. But instead of taking the bottom-up approach that is need based, they do the opposite, by assuming what need is most important whilst in fact ignoring the most crucial. 

Generally, westerners ask themselves how to deal with being a person of privilege while working in global development. This school of thought assumes that African developing nations are to be pitied. This attitude is despised by Africans, I can vouch for that. Every year we see thousands of “privileged” westerners eager to come “help the underprivileged” because they care.

This attitudes reeks of a sanctimonious benevolent westerner who claim they are coming to rescue the tragic continent that is full of a filthy, starving, uneducated population.

With this is mind, here is the attitude that would be ideal:

•  Africans would most likely want to be engaged with the people who believe that they are worth struggling with, not just to be pitied
• If you approach your work with an attitude that you are privileged and that only your help can help alleviate a situation, there will not possibly be authentic relations. No one, even the most underprivileged, likes to be looked down upon, even if they are in rugs
•  If you have a condescending attitude towards other people, and ignore that you need to see other humans as also human, you are on the wrong path
• You may as well see yourself as the master and me as the slave.

I know that there are countless people in the nonprofit world who have done a great deal of good. But anyone who has a condescending attitude towards the poor should not set foot in the continent. Many from the developed world – in government, multilateral agencies, business, and academia – have a similar attitude.

Basically, it isn't so hard for some humans to see other humans as also human. If one has a perception of “privilege” we will welcome you with our African warmth, enjoy what your ‘privilege’ can offer and say good riddance when you leave.

And I sat back and watched the faces of the class. 

NOW is the RIGHT thing to do

Selective humanity is a ground reality, but is often disguised in the name of targeted intervention and preservation of order, culture, faith, and even most shocking, preservation of human race itself.

We live every day in the oppression of Isms; …sexism, racism, heterosexism, classism, etc. and the burden of privilege that has evolved with every new generation of a new ism. Our understanding of questioning these privileges is watered down as acts of rebellion and where possible, punitive laws and harsh punishments are used to intimidate and eradicate the nonconformists. 

Is Might always RIGHT?

Is there a simple answer to the question how to change? Why are we so quick to judge without removing the logs in our own eyes first? Are the isms of oppression so ingrained in us that we are unable to make right RIGHTS? Why do we deny the intersectionality of oppressions even when it stares right back at us when we look at each other?

It is not an easy task for one person to carry the weight of the world on their shoulders. We do not need to look beyond us for other people to dictate what is defined as right and not RIGHT. We are all born equal, and everything else is inculcated to us. Sometimes we do not question these inculcations because we grow comfortable being in them but does it strip us of what makes us basically common? 

We carry on unashamed, acts of vilifying those we do not understand, those we look down upon, those who are different from us, ignoring the diversity that is us.

What can be done? Perhaps we should become more aware, brave up and not cower in fear or embarrassment when speaking up about sensitive RIGHTS issues. It has been for decades, and continues to be, a struggle for those who question status quos, those who ask questions that make us fidget in our seats, those who expressly denounce segregation and vindictive, subjective, plain selfish interpretations of what is right, ignoring what is RIGHT. 

NOW is the right time to do what is RIGHT. It’s a road less travelled, with unimaginable challenges when looks of fear and defeat stare back from those who are unable to speak up. Heartbreaking when tears from pain flow from us and around us. 

The RIGHTS path is a struggle for us, but the rewards of even the slightest positive change is so rewarding and outweighs all negative consequences.

Taking a moment to breath in the changing winds

So, another year passes, and I am celebrating my born-date again tomorrow (Sept 27th). Thinking through what has transpired over the last year....from work to relationships, to fun, to the tears and low moments, to self evaluation, to dreams and just blank moments.

Having discovered a lot about myself after being pried out of my comfort zone, from where I had for years circled about, I cannot lie that I have fully adjusted yet. However, I have learnt to take it in stride and accept that I do not have answers to everything, and I cannot carry the weight of the world because I got two hands only.

Oh, don't I admire people who are able to wake up one day after going through a messy situation and resolve to just forget it and move on as if nothing happened. Why can I not do that? My sister said, it is because apparently, some people like me tend to want to trend so carefully, feeling wooiee for everybody else and forgetting to feel wooiee for myself. I ain't no saint though and I have done my share of terrible things.

So here is a tribute to the people I have hurt that past year. I have not yet come up with a way in which I can take that away. However, I still have a tug in my heart every time I think of you, and I smile once in while when some memories come flooding back. Like when I would pick up my camera and just flick away, then we would sit and review the photos that captured the bare soul, so prominently evident in your eyes and body. I hope I have made it easier to make you still talk to me and have a laugh with me before the awkwardness sets in and we have to say our goodbyes till the next conversation. It is the least I could do.

And for the new friends and loved one that I have met over the past year, foregoing my weaknesses and flaws to embrace me as I am, to love me and stand by me...to let go when my claws come out and am a pain in the ass for at times, I thank you.

Here's to another year of better things to come!

Identity Denied

I have heard numerous stories and experiences told by queer folk about their coming out. Each of them was unique, with both laughter and tears. One friend of mine was recently disowned by his family when they found out he was gay. His father threw out his mother as well, because “your son is a disgrace to this family’’.  Suddenly, the father now refers to my friend as his mother’s and that his ‘blood’ does not carry the gay gene, he must have got the gene from the mother.

One can only begin to imagine what the boy is going through now. I partly understand it, from my coming out experience. My coming out has been a process, it still is and in my opinion, this process never ends, ever. If you are not coming out to a family member today, or a friend, colleagues...etc, you are tomorrow, and the next month, next year.....and it goes on and on.

When my sisters started teasing me years ago about how "choosy" I was because I would dismiss every boy that tried to ask me out, I so wished that I would just let them know that boys are not my thing. When I would not bring any boys home, they tried to fix me with blind dates, and when all that failed, they sat and watched so that they could figure out what my deal was.

When I u-hauled with my first girlfriend, I heard them say that I have made a good decision to move in with my good friend because then, we would share expenses in the tougher economic situation. On other occasions, they would tell me to stop behaving like the last born I am for wanting to always have someone live with me, and just start living on own. I never offered them an explanation that this was actually my partner, the person that I wanted to share my life with.

Eventually, I was bursting to tell them not to hold their breath anymore by waiting for me to bring a boy home. My big family is like a market place so I was sure that if I talked to one of my sisters, the news would spread in an instance. I was right! :-)!

Funny thing is, some of them said it was about time, and that the pieces of the big puzzle about me had finally just fallen into place. My brother, bless his soul, said he was happy for me and my sexuality did not change his love for me at all. However, I knew there was trouble when my sister Kui* started brewing trouble. Kui had always found a way of annoying me somehow. I do love her, but sometimes I think she is and has always been  miss goody-two-shoes. She always finds a way of having her way...she talks too much and judges too much and is always complaining about one thing or the other.

I get texts from her to date, telling me that God loves me....that am beautiful and can do anything I want to do in life....that I can succeed in whatever I do if I put my mind to it... Just subtle hints that I was erring in the path I have chosen for my life,… or that I was putting a dent in the flowery arrangement that she envisions as our perfect family. Usually, besides making note of them, I ignore the texts.

But recently, she voiced the boldest and most forward disapproval of my sexuality. She said that whatever I am, "is not fair to them (family) or to the kids (my nieces and nephews) some of whom are already teenagers and may start questioning why I am the only one in the family that has not introduced an 'uncle nanii' to them".

That statement stung, and  it stung deep. I felt that it was as if she was removing me from the picture completely by glaring my difference and using it as reason to justify her discomfort...and the kids were excellent bait! I wondered if she stopped to think about me for a minute, or cared about my happiness.

True that coming out is a task...it’s almost like having to introduce yourself over and over because some people just do not let go. Like you have to keep justifying yourself every time someone questions why you are what you are. Maybe we could pull a Jodie Foster move and dictate time and dictate out time and conditions under which we come out.

I wonder if you guys have been in situations such as this. I usually do not give a shit about a total stranger who doesn’t know me or anything about my life, but when your family, the people who are closest to you, question and deny you, that is beyond hurting. And worse, the heteronormative society that we are living in at the moment is unforgiving. Shall we ever get to that level that we are yearn for?